Episode 3: How to Combat Imposter Syndrome

Sep 03, 2019

 

Why you have to check out today’s podcast:

  • Find out what imposter syndrome is and how it affects the mindset.
  • Be informed on the causes of imposter syndrome.
  • Learn effective ways to deal with and face imposter syndrome.

 

Summary

While there are different marketing strategies of a business to increase its profitability, it is equally important for business owners to deal with and develop an entrepreneurial mindset.   But what if, as a human being, the business owner faces personal hurdles feeling unworthy of their accomplishments, or lacking self-confidence, or simply not feeling good enough? This imposter syndrome is common to entrepreneurs and April is no exception.  Join her in this episode as she reveals her struggles to inspire others, and challenges her fellow entrepreneurs to get past any blockers that will move your business forward.   

 

If I put myself out there, yes, it is a little scary.  But look at how I can impact others and help others. So, I tell myself that it's being selfish to only think about my fear of being judged instead of thinking who out there needs to hear my message.

- April Meese

 

Topics Covered:

01:02 – April talks about what imposter syndrome is       

05:05 – Her perspective on why imposter syndrome happens

06:31 – How to effectively deal and face the fear of not being valued and valuable enough

09:39 – Retraining your brain as a way to deal with imposter syndrome

11:00 – Showing grace and love towards others who experience this struggle

 

Key Takeaways:

“That little voice that keeps us safe also keeps us small because it keeps us from making a bigger impact and we fear to put ourselves out there. It keeps us from our fullest potential.” – April Meese

 “Being human means that we all deal with a feeling of unworthy and that is what I am calling this imposter syndrome.” – April Meese

 “Retraining your brain means that you see the reward over the risk. So, you identify what is the reward and you focus on that and you convince your brain that it is exciting. And that means it's also enjoyable. So, the body is then relaxed and can calm down instead of being scared. – April Meese

 

If you would like to get a FREE copy of my "Uncommon Strategies to Get Clients Now" where I share my signature Client Attraction Formula then click here for that PDF https://www.aprilmeese.com/client-attraction-formula
Connect with April Meese:

 

Full Episode Transcription

(Note:  This transcript was created using Temi, an automated transcription service.  Please bear with us if you found any transcription or grammatical errors.)

April Meese: Growing your beauty business doesn't have to be overwhelming. It's all about mastering a few key strategies and systems to save you time. Welcome to Beauty Marketing Simplified! A podcast dedicated to helping you on your entrepreneurial journey. I'm your host, April Meese. I'm a permanent cosmetic artist that belt my six-figure business while only working three days a week and raising twin toddlers. I'm here to tell you it is possible for you too. With a background in Spa marketing, it's my mission to help women worldwide get more profits while pursuing their passion and purpose. Let's transform your beauty business for more income and less stress starting right now.

April Meese: Welcome back to episode three and today's episode is impostor syndrome. So let me ask you a question. Have you ever been about to do a live video or make a big leap of faith in your beauty business?

April Meese: And then you heard a little voice inside your head that says, Hey, who do you think you are? That little voice that keeps us safe also keeps us small because it keeps us from making a bigger impact, and we fear to put ourselves out there. It keeps us from our fullest potential. So if you've ever felt that way, today's episode is for you. But first, I want to give a disclaimer that my intention is to create useful business content on this podcast. And I feel that there is so much of the tasks and strategies that we talk about for marketing, but a lot of it is also the inner game. So part of being an entrepreneur is really getting past our mindset. In fact, Tony Robin says 20% is tactic, and 80% is the mindset. So we will definitely cover some marketing tactics and strategies to help you build your beauty business.

April Meese: But I also plan on sharing topics that are on my heart and mind. And so not every episode will be relevant to where you are at this moment in your business or your life. But I believe that someone will hear this message and it will be the perfect time for them to hear it. So as I say, everything has a reason or a season. And with that said, I think that this episode is a topic that everyone can relate to in some way or at some time in your life. Because being human means that we all deal with a feeling of unworthy, and that is what I am calling this imposter syndrome. So it shows up right before about to do something big in your life. It can even show up on small things. And like I said your first live video that we discussed last week, and it shows up in other ways too, like the idea that if they found out I'm really not as great as they think I am or they discover that I'm not an expert because actually who honestly really is ever an expert always learning right?

April Meese: But that they will no longer want to listen to me or that the whole business will collapse and everything will go away. Right? Like the scale can be something so small or something so big. And for me, this imposter syndrome shows up as always trying to prove my worth. And maybe that's because dad bailed when I was a baby or just maybe growing up in the 80s you know, never feeling like I was pretty enough, thin enough, smart enough. I mean, I could go on about all the diets and pills on the market that I tried diet pills to get past it. But still, to this day, I struggle with image and professionally imposter syndrome. It's this little voice again that says, who are you to be talking about marketing and social media when you don't even have that many followers on Instagram? And if they look at your Instagram, they're going to see that you're a fraud.

April Meese: Now the reality is that I have neglected Instagram and I've put most of my love and attention into Facebook, and building other platforms and actually I have a successful business really despite neglecting Instagram and my Instagram following being small. But I want to really dive into this imposter syndrome. You know, this story that would keep me from doing other things, right? That would keep me from showing up and serving you now. So let's first talk about why this happens, when I want to show up to help others with what I've learned. My mind tells me that story, right? That story of who are you and it triggers that imposter syndrome. And this is true for everyone. The brain generates this fight or flight response, and in this case, it's flight, right? You want to run away because our brains weren't meant to help us succeed.

April Meese: They were actually intended to keep us safe with what's familiar. And it goes back to you know, the primal times when taking risk meant that you might be eaten by a large animal like a tiger or something. So your brain is wired to protect you. And in today's standards, that means it protects you from fear of judgment. And yes, when you put yourself out there, there will be people that make judgments, you know, good or bad, everyone will have an opinion. So the brain activates that flight response because we all have core needs and values of being loved and accepted in the world, right? So being part of a tribe is also one of those primal features of the brain. Because that would ensure greater chances of survival. So our brains are wired in this way. So how do we get past this imposter syndrome and these fears of not being valued and valuable enough?

April Meese: And I'll just give you, the way I deal with imposter syndrome is to start to look for ways that it isn't true. So I call this poking holes in the story so that it doesn't seem like an absolute truth, right? So sometimes our beliefs can seem absolutely true to us, but then when you start to look at it a little deeper, you'll say, well, okay, it's not completely true. So, for example, I would say yes, I do have a small following, but that doesn't negate the fact that I did build a very successful business with a small following. And now that I say it out loud and think about it, it is more of a credit to my success that I had a very powerful marketing message and in connection with my clients, despite having a small audience, right? So I didn't buy followers, and I didn't get caught up in vanity numbers.

April Meese: In fact, I can think of lots of influencers who have tens of thousands and even millions of fans, but are still broke. So if I start thinking I'm not established enough or smart enough or any other kind of good enough, then after that I start to discredit the belief, right? And so that is something that you could do as well. I then tell the opposite story. So first I poke holes in the belief and start to say, if this, well then that, so for example, for you, if you say, well, if I put myself out there on video, I might be judged. And that's true, but you could also help someone, okay? And you're not going to die, right? You will live through it. And these are the ways that you can start to poke holes in the story. So then I tell myself the opposite story.

April Meese: If I put myself out there, yes it is a little scary, but look at how I can impact others and help others. So I tell myself that it's being selfish to only think about my fear of being judged instead of thinking who out there needs to hear my message. Right? And the same is true for you. You make a difference in someone's life by showing up that day and giving your message a message that they need to hear. Maybe it's that mom that hasn't done anything for herself in a decade. Maybe your message leads to her booking of service with you. And then that service then leads to getting more time with her family or feeling more confident and then she feels more confident, and she gets a promotion, and that financially helps her family more. And it goes on and on and on. So if you take the focus off of yourself and you think of others, that's a way to also get past the imposter syndrome.

April Meese: And really all of this is what I call retraining your brain. So, retraining your brain means that you see the reward over the risk. So you identify what is the reward, and you focus on that and you convince your brain that it is exciting. And that means it's also enjoyable. So the body is then relaxed and can calm down instead of being scared, right? So fear is excitement without breath. That's not my quote, but I just love that quote. And you can start to rewire your brain and start to build that courage muscle. And also, that also builds more resilience in your brain. So when you go to do the next thing to move your business in your life forward, you won't be as fearful, right? It gets easier each time. And if none of that works, if you are still focused on yourself, and you cannot see the reward.

April Meese: The last thing that I would say is what if your daughter, your sister, your mother, a friend or anyone that you love dearly was personally saying this to you? So, for example, if my daughter was saying that she wasn't good enough, then I would find all of the evidence to prove she was worthy. Or if she said she feared that she would be judged, I would tell her that she is perfect the way she is and she should go after her dreams. No matter what anyone thinks or says about her, right? So it's easy for us to be hard on ourselves, but to show grace and love towards others. So just give yourself the pep talk that you would give to someone you love. And now I wish I could tell you that imposter syndrome or negative thoughts are no longer a struggle for me. I wish I could announce to the world that I love myself completely and really mean it.

April Meese: I wish I could say I no longer fear being judged. But the truth is I'm still disappointed when I don't hit business goals, and I'm not totally happy with my reflection in the mirror. And you know, like everyone, I have painful parts of my childhood and embarrassing parts of my life currently where it feels a little chaotic to this day. But by no means do I have this figured out, and I'll still be working on this probably for the rest of my life, but I have to share my story to hopefully help others release their fears and their false and hurtful mind chatter of these, you know, made up stories and this association. And these feelings of unworthiness. So my challenge is for you to get past the imposter syndrome and stay right down that one thing that you need to do in your business that you know will move your business forward.

April Meese: That thing that you've been putting off that's been, you know, a bit scary, but you know, will make a big difference and then make a plan to actually do it. And so, we would love to hear from you about any topics that you want us to discuss, any struggles that you're facing. And yeah, we want to hear from you. So you know that connections and your reviews are what's really important to us when you subscribe to the podcast. That's awesome. The reviews are the real lifeblood of any podcast. And so, we would consider you our best friend if you took two minutes and left an honest review, and also let us know, reach out to us on Facebook, or our website, and let us know what topics you would like us to cover. And so, we look forward to helping you on your journey and bringing you information that you need. And so with that, I will sign off with grit and grace, hugs and high fives. I'll talk to you soon.

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